GWiMMRN, FOCUS on Saturday Edition

This website has it all: pussy pemmican, homeless hoagies, sharks, the adorable little ass hairs near Helen Thomas's starfish, and a dog who does not know how to take a shit.

For providing you with these myriad and sundry thing, all that I ask is that you FOCUS. I'm not getting the kind of focus I need. This is disappointing. WORK ON IT. FOCUS.

What's in my mouth right now can be found in the clues up above. Guess what it is.

UPDATE: For another clue, unscramble this word: SUCK MY COCK.

FURTHER UPDATE: GROW UP.

GWiMMRN, Horse Testicles and Dog Shit Edition

There's no better time than right now to grow up. Growing up is what all the cool kids are doing and growing up is essential for healthy bones and teeth (which are kinda like bones. Isn't that weird? That we chew with bones jutting out of our heads? Well, fuck you, too.). Growing up is also a part of this good breakfast.

So, grow up, and GWiMMRN:

A) Thatithtical prothedurth.
B) The unrelenting stupidity of the Daily 10, whether it is the Daily 10, or Daily 10 Weekend.
C) Sal Masekela, whose unfunny banter on the Daily 10 makes little birds weep in agony.
D) The annoying, horse testicle like appearance of Debbie Matenopoulos.
E) Yellow FEVER!
F) Thy Kingdom Come.
G) The Gulf. The FUCKING gulf.
H) A big, fat cock with Catt "Shitt" Sadler's tuna-taco still attached.

Rumors of My Retirement Are Greatly Exaggerated

I've heard you whispering, "Is My Mouth going to retire? Is it all over for My Mouth? Why am I such an unFOCUSing dicknozzle?" Well, cut it the fuck out. I'm here to stay. I'm going to be here until the stars burn out. With that in mind, get your worthless, pathetic little ass in gear and GWiMM.

RN!

A) A dying rhinoceros that Deroy Murdock, "Patron Saint" of GWiMMRN, hasn't yet sucked off, and the clock is ticking...
B) Lipstick licked lusciously off Linda Lavin's labia
C) A titbit of a sweetmeat
D) Kim Cattrall's stupid, bad-attitude face that you just want to punch so hard with your cock that her teeth shear through her tongue in a spray of bloody saliva and chunks of enamel
E) The revolting, pulpy, crimson matter being spread on a slice of bread to the obvious delight of a demon-possessed child:


F) A big, fat cockleshell

Rock My Groin

Ever feel like a tuft of pubic hair blowin' in the wind?

If so, you are a LOSER. Be a winner and GWiMMRN, because at GWiMMRN, everyone's a winner (except for you)!

A) Rocketboom!
B) A wistful notion that passed, alas.
C) A rememberance of wistful notions past.
D) Supper drippy diarrhea dog feces with boiled, poisonous mushrooms.
E) Obi-Wan Yoda Kennal-obi



F) A big, fat cock.

GWiMMRN, Catt "Shitt" Sadler Edition

I was thinking about turning this website into a Catt "Shitt" Sadler fansite, due to the appalling lack of FOCUS here. But then I asked myself, "Why the FUCK does anyone care about this hairy coochie-trained broad and some stupid show she's on that I've never seen a second of?"

Thank God for sanity.

Now, thank God for what's in my mouth right now, and guess what it is:

A) Seven used Neuticles, cut from a dead dog's scrotum (the owner was an overachiever)
B) A homunculus
C) The Fiend Folio
D) A pet rot grub that has an alignment of Evil which is pretty weird because it's really just a maggot, you know, and it's actually pretty nice to me
E) Little Debbie's hairy li'l snatcheroo, which is fairly similar to Meg Ryan's hairy li'l snatcheroo except that the hair color is a bit lighter and tastes like frosting
F) The pathos inspiring words of, "WAHHH! BOO FUCKING HOO HOO HOO! I can't stand to see a man's horribly inflated scrotum! WAHHH! *snf*"
G) The secret fact that I myself can barely stand to see a man's horribly inflated scrotum, but don't tell anyone
H) The Big Rock Candy Mountain
I) A big, fat cock candy mountain

Stop Yer Cryin', and GWiMMRN

Bitch, bitch, bitch. That's all you people do. As if I don't have enough to do, now I have to hear about what you don't want to see.

WAHHH! BOO FUCKING HOO HOO HOO! I can't stand to see a man's horribly inflated scrotum! WAHHH! *snf*

Grow up, for Pete's sake. GWiMMRN:

A) Bitchin' and whinin' about the modern era.
B) Tuh-tuh-tuh-FUCKFUCKPISSYFUCKYSHITASSBASTARD
MUTHERFUCKERCUNTCUNT-tourette's syndrome.
C) The is/ought fallacy.
D) A bagel with a schmear of shit-cheese.
E) The Dalai Lama's new haircut.
F) SHILOH!, whose bad name has finally been liberated by two of the most smug people on Earf.
G) This guy's big, fat cock.

GWiMMRN, Sorry for the Inflated Ball-Sack Picture Edition

Someone was bitching about yesterday's post. Sorry, but sometimes, I place odd or disturbing things in my mouth. I'm not without mercy, however, so this time, I shall only put tasty, pleasant things into my mouth today. What's in it now?

A) A Twinkie
B) A fruit pie
C) A jelly donut
D) An oatmeal creme pie
E) A chocolate cupcake
F) Sopapillas with honey

UPDATE:


Sorry.