"GWiMMRN," "The 'Patron Saint' Speaks Out"

"Hello."

"I am Deroy Murdock, so-called 'Patron Saint' of GWiMMRN."

"I am here to tell you that I am nothing of the kind."

"This website is a horror that should never have been birthed."

"If I had the time to respond to the appalling misuse of my name and character, let alone all of the false statements attributed to me here, I would be responding right now."

"But I don't."

"And I'm not responding."

"If I were to respond, I would say one thing."

"That thing is, as you've undoubtedly guessed, is 'GROW UP'."

"At any rate, I have now taken control of this DIGUSTING excuse for a blog."

"It is now mine."

"Henceforth, it shall be a clean place."

"Not an obscene wreck."

"When I find the time out of my busy schedule, I shall post here again."

"Until then, I must insist that you GROW UP."

"So GROW UP."

"And if you don't like that, you can just gobble my ass cheeks."

"Thank you."