5/3/06

It's TIME...

For another BUMP DAY Edition of GWiMMRN! You know, I remember the good old days, when GWiMMRN had Editions. Most people don't remember those halcyon days of yesteryear, when times were good and Jesus Christ Himself was giving out free blowjobs to all comers. Yup. Well, enough reminiscing. Time for the guessing:

A) A hot, yellow baptism with a side order of "immigrant thperm"
B) Eugene's breakfast
C) Twelve of those little skin-flaps that grow in and around your armpit
D) What looks like a torture device but is really a thing women put up their, um, you know. Their...parts. Get it? That place...down there. You know: what do you call it? The, uhhh, well...SUHHHHHH-NATCH!
E) The smell of popcorn popped inside Helen Thomas's pink parts
F) A brine shrimp sandwich
G) Jordan's roommate, who is moving out because, and I quote, "She doesn't like my music. Always bitching about me singing the song I wrote:
*spurrrrt!* *spurrt* *spurt*

*spurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrttt!*

*spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt* *spurt*

CAT SHIT

Oh, yeah

And the whole 'Dod-a-chock? Dum-a-chum?' thing was drivin' me nuts."
H) Ash's big, fat cock

13 Comments:

Anonymous Ash said...

call me

9:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For the love of Pete, get the heck out of my armpit already!

9:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brine shrimp, though they be little, are STILL not Kosher.

9:04 AM  
Anonymous Jordan's Roomate said...

YOU have NO idea what it was like in there. A fucking HORROR show, nightly. It was awful. I should have left months ago. Do you REALIZE how many Cleveland Steamers her ex-boyfriend gave her?

Ugh. I'm outta there.

9:06 AM  
Anonymous Jordan, Cleveland Steamer Recipient Extraordinaire said...

he gave me 476...every time he had to take a dump..he broke my heart...

love me...decant your hot, stinking diarrhea all over my crying face...

10:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm not eating the Thomas Corn.

10:05 AM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

No, Ash.

I'm not calling you.

FOCUS.

10:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, I've eaten 2500 brine shrimp sandwiches and I'm still hungry.

10:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I really have to take a shit.

11:20 AM  
Anonymous Jordan, Cleveland Steamer Recipient Extraordinaire said...

please..take it on me...be my friend...

give me the wet, brown, abominably smelly gift of your feces...

make me your victim..love me...call me on the telephone and make wet, slapping noises to me all night long..oh god...my heart is so broken...

take it easy...heh...

11:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can you believe it? I STILL have to take a shit.

It's probably, like, a foot wide by now. It'll take the Jaws of Life to wrestle that fecal beast to the bowl. It's probably all dark brown, and hard, with really sharp edges that cut the sphincter. I'll probably find dabs of blood on my toilet paper.

Wow.

I'm kinda scared, now. I'm really sorry I didn't take that shit earlier. I'm really living a life of regret right about now.

Geeze.

Well, here goes. Take it easy, heh heh.

1:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, I'm back.

It really wasn't so bad. But, like, it came out in mid-sized, but REALLY heavy chunks. One of them hit the bowl like a meteor from space and totally soaked my balls. The water's cold.

I still kinda feel like I have to take a shit. It's not so urgent. I was, for all intents and purposes, prairie doggin' there for a while.

I wonder when I'll have to take a shit again. I learned my lesson, though.

1:26 PM  
Anonymous The Guy Who Ejaculated Blood in the Comments said...

I can't say I care about your feces.

I really can't say that.

Heh. See ya on the flip side. Heh heh.

*spurrrrtt!!!*

Oh! Ew. Still bloody.

2:22 PM  

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