3/7/06

Holy Fat Cocks! It's the 300th Relentless Mouthable!!!

I can't believe I made it to 300! It's a fucking MIRACLE, like...like the loaves and the fishes! Jesus Cockgobbling CHRIST! I feel like that DISGUSTING Reese Witherspoon, America's Sweetheart!

I just want you all to know that I'm not going to let it go to my head. I'm still the same person stuffing all manner of things into my mouth. I'm going to SHARE in the celebration, however, by LETTING you Guess What's in My Mouth Right Now:

A) *rffrrfffrrrppptttt* *frrrggppttt* *fffrrrpPPPPtppptttt* *frrpppyyttt* *gheeerppttt* *hurmptttttttttttpt-ptptpt* *frrppptttppprrrtttrrrp* *GHEEERRPPPTTTttptpptt* *hurumptppptttptpt* *SQUIRRRBBTSPLOOOSH*
B) Party favors from the kind of party where all the guys blow cumbubbles with their semen and try to get the ovulating ladies pregnant
C) Grated Parmesan FECES
D) A nice, crispy, fried chicken breast with cornbread
E) Three pancreases
F) Hello Kitty Meow-Berry Pop-Tarts, AKA "leftover fruit shit"
G) Hello Kitty Toys for Twats
H) A Harry Potter Nimbus 2000 and a FR-OOZE Pop, where "apparently the child sucks on the pop until a point where the 'goo' center is made available and it is squirted into the mouth with a squeeze to the base"
I) Harry Potter's big, fat, nocturnally emitting cock

18 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Congratulations, you sick fuck. I'M going to celebrate by never reading this DISGUSTING web site again.

8:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I would be in geek heaven to eat a Hello Kitty Meow-Berry Pop-Tart with Harry Potter's FR-OOZE pop goo slathered, and I do mean SLATHERED, all over it.

Ungh, I forgot to add.

8:04 AM  
Anonymous D. Murdock, Patron Saint of GWiMMRN said...

"300? I guess you've got a one-way ticket to the Sick Fuck Hall of Fame."

"Grow up."

8:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As someone who has read all 300 posts, I'd like to say that I was in no way affected by them whatsoever.

I'd also like to add that I dress my penis in a lil' purple space suit every morning, and call herm Captain Willie Commando, General of the Vaginal Frontiers.

Moreover, I was doing this well before I ever heard of GWiMMRN.

I'd desperately like to grow up.

8:07 AM  
Anonymous Small Child said...

*slurp slurp*

*squeeze*

*spurrrrrrrrt*

Ew!

8:09 AM  
Anonymous Captain Willie Commando, General of the Vaginal Frontiers said...

To the snatch, and beyond!

8:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This tea I'm slurping on is so disgusting I'd like to throw up.

*sluuurrrppp*

Ew, indeed.

*ssslluurrppp*

DISGUSTING. Ick.

*ssluuuurrrppp*

Ugh.

8:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

GIVE ME BACK MY PANCREASSSSSSSSSSSSS!

8:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think it's extremely DISGUSTING to serve candy to children that is designed to squirt "goo" into their mouths.

8:51 AM  
Anonymous Spermy McBurp said...

I've been known to squirt "goo" into people's mouths when they squeeze the base of my DING-DONG.

The "goo" being, of course, a greasy green milkshake.

9:19 AM  
Anonymous SPERMY McBURP FAN CLUB said...

WE LOVE YOU SPERMY! DON'T *urp* CHANGE A THING!

9:50 AM  
Blogger Michele said...

Never popped a cherry tart...or strawberry...I'm more into the blues.

congrats on the 300th mouthpiece.

9:59 AM  
Anonymous H. Potter said...

*spurrrrrrrrrt!*

Oh!

*spppppurrrtttt*

Oooh!

*spurrrttt*

Ungh!

*sppurtt*

Ah!

*spurt*

Oh oh!

*sprt*

Oooo ooo!

*spt*

Ungh Ungh Ungh!

10:09 AM  
Blogger Reese Witherspoon, America's Sweetheart said...

You DON'T feel like me! You DON'T!

12:05 PM  
Anonymous Lobster Minstrel Show said...

mmmMMMMAAAmmmYYY!! HowILuvYa HowILuvYa MMMmmmmAAAAMMMYYY!!

Ha cha cha cha!

1:37 PM  
Anonymous Fucking Annoyingly Fake Person said...

Hi! I just wanted to touch base with you and find out how you're doing! O.K.! See you later!

2:02 PM  
Blogger Eugene said...

Have you seen your balls lately?

2:31 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

None of your comments seem to have anything at all to do with what's in my mouth right now.

FOCUS.

say it with me: I CAN I CAN I CAN FOCUS.

1:00 PM  

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