8/20/06

GWiMMRN, Slack, Droopy ASSHOLE Edition

Good morning, sunshine!

GWiMM:

A) Brian DePalma's latest
B) Parakeet feet
C) Secret knowledge
D) Used ben-wa balls, viciously seized from Nicole Ritchie's calloused, balding cunny
E) A parrot without a beak
F) Glistening, yellowish clots
G) Abortion Scampi
H) A big, fat monckey cock

12 Comments:

Anonymous Brian DePalma said...

Like Star Jones Reynolds, Nicole Ritchie, Paris Hilton, Larry "Bud" Melman, Helen Thomas, Deroy Murdock, and THIS Surprised Looking Turd, I have joined the long line of outraged, REAL people who have been talked about in an unruly and completely untrue way, with things attributed to them that they simply did not do.

I had nothing to do with that movie. NOTHING.

If I had, you certainly would have seen the monkey money shot.

I would say "Thank you," but that would be disingenuous of me.

Dickweasels.

11:02 AM  
Anonymous Karr said...

I have secret knowledge, too.

I hope they fry my balls.

11:03 AM  
Anonymous Your Parakeet said...

my feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!

11:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Parakeet feet are pretty tasty.

*tp* *tp*

Yup.

11:47 AM  
Anonymous A. Monqey said...

I'd like to point out that you misspelled "monqey" in H).

Please fix.

Thank you!

11:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Uh, hello?

Yes. I...I bought this parrot at this establishment. And, well...his beak fell off. Actually, it fell off in the car ride home.

I'm...I...well, I really don't, um, I don't know how to feed him. If he's thirsty, should I just dunk his little parrot head under water until he stops blowing bubbles?

To be honest, I'd prefer to return him. I know I got him at half price, but nobody told me that his beak would fall off.

Whew.

11:51 AM  
Anonymous Pet Shop Owner said...

His beak fell off because you abused him anally.

Stop it and his beak will grow back.

12:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is anybody else having a hard time getting back to work?

I... I think I've been on vacation too long.

I don't feel like working, yet I have a lot of work to do.

Well.

That's that.

See ya later, alligator.

12:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah. Heh heh.

I hear ya.

In a while, crocodile.

Yeah.

So, catch ya.

Dickweasel.

12:28 PM  
Anonymous Pet Shop Customer said...

Why, why you!

I would NEVER EVER abuse an animal, anally or otherwise!!

What kind of sick maniac are you? My word! My sainted HAT!

That's sick!

Sick, sick, sick!

I want my money back immediately!

Oh, and...

Do you happen to have any parrots with larger, um...rectums?

Thank you!

12:32 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

You did it, Brian. We all know you did it.

12:33 PM  
Anonymous Brian DePalma said...

That's MISTER DePalma to you, Ms. Dickweasel.

2:13 PM  

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