2/11/06

Sacrifice ALL for My Mouth, and Be Saved!

The one word of truth can be found in my mouth. My mouth is the way to Salvation. I mean that, you know. It's not megalomania. Believe me. To find this truth, guess what's in my mouth right now:

A) The Mouthettes, all of 'em except the blonde one
B) The adorable little ass hairs near Harrison Ford's starfish that just trill whenever he growls something, which is all the time
C) The horrible, crusty bottom of the Litter Maid, comprised of cat piss, feces, mostly disintegrated "clumping" litter granules, and maple syrup
D) A mosque clock that goes, "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" twice a day really loudly and scares the shit out of the cats
E) Every sick fuck that whacked his peepee to countdown websites announcing when Lindsay Lohan and the Olsen Twins would become "legal;" I mean, come on man, get a fucking life already
F) Harrison Ford's big, fat cock

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm... I'm sorry. I'm just, you know, so glad... that it's finally OVER, you know? The waaaaiiiting iiiis the haaardest paaart.

8:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tell me again; why is there maple syrup at the BOTTOM of the kitty litter pan? Why isn't it at the top where it belongs?

8:05 AM  
Anonymous OHHHHHHHH! Clock said...

OHHHHHHHHHHHHWEEEEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHH OOOOHHHHEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH.

oooooooooOOOOOOHHHHHHhhhhhh

AHHHHHHH!

8:06 AM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

The syrup soaks into the litter on Pancake Sundays.

9:19 AM  
Anonymous The adorable little ass hairs near Harrison Ford's starfish said...

*trill*

9:20 AM  
Anonymous H. Ford said...

How dare YOU, sir?

*trill*

Oh!

9:21 AM  

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