Ram It
That's right. RAM. IT. Tell that to your boss, whose always coming around, SNOOPING, seeing what you're DOING. Ram it up your foreskin, Boss. That's what you should say.
GUESS WHAT'S IN MY MOUTH RIGHT NOW, BOSS:
A) Broccoli crowns.
B) The testicles of a spicy italian sausage.
C) An angry little twat.
D) An insincere thank you.
E) BLOOD ORANGES. MANY, MANY BLOOOOOOOOOD ORANGES.
F) Monkey penis. That's right. MONKEY. PENIS.
G) You want me to go on? Fine.
H) A BIG, FAT FUCKING COCK.
UPDATE: I am the Man from U.N.G.H.
GUESS WHAT'S IN MY MOUTH RIGHT NOW, BOSS:
A) Broccoli crowns.
B) The testicles of a spicy italian sausage.
C) An angry little twat.
D) An insincere thank you.
E) BLOOD ORANGES. MANY, MANY BLOOOOOOOOOD ORANGES.
F) Monkey penis. That's right. MONKEY. PENIS.
G) You want me to go on? Fine.
H) A BIG, FAT FUCKING COCK.
UPDATE: I am the Man from U.N.G.H.
posted by My Mouth at 7:59 AM
6 Comments:
What does U.N.G.H. stand for? And do you wear turtleneck sweaters like Robert Vaughn?
Hey! What'sa your problem? Spicy Italian sausagesa don'ta havea testiclesa!
a!
Please, please no more.
Yes.
Yes it is.
You still here? Clean out your desk.
Let me clarify Letter C. I use the diminutive, but I really think it's an angry, big twat. Really big. Monumental. Like a Taj mahal to twatness.
There. Now FO-CUS on what's in my mouth right now. FO-CUS.
I have no idea how people around you don't stop slapping you so that you have a moment to tap out your monkey-like responses.
FO-CUS. ON MY MOUTH. Nothing Else Matters.
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