2/2/06

Ram It

That's right. RAM. IT. Tell that to your boss, whose always coming around, SNOOPING, seeing what you're DOING. Ram it up your foreskin, Boss. That's what you should say.

GUESS WHAT'S IN MY MOUTH RIGHT NOW, BOSS:

A) Broccoli crowns.
B) The testicles of a spicy italian sausage.
C) An angry little twat.
D) An insincere thank you.
E) BLOOD ORANGES. MANY, MANY BLOOOOOOOOOD ORANGES.
F) Monkey penis. That's right. MONKEY. PENIS.
G) You want me to go on? Fine.
H) A BIG, FAT FUCKING COCK.

UPDATE: I am the Man from U.N.G.H.

9 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

What does U.N.G.H. stand for? And do you wear turtleneck sweaters like Robert Vaughn?

8:53 AM  
Anonymous S. Alito said...

Hey! What'sa your problem? Spicy Italian sausagesa don'ta havea testiclesa!

a!

8:54 AM  
Anonymous The Boss's Foreskin said...

Please, please no more.

8:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's just a parade of dicks going up your poop-shute, isn't it, boss?

9:42 AM  
Anonymous The Boss said...

Yes.

Yes it is.

You still here? Clean out your desk.

9:43 AM  
Blogger Philosopher Newport said...

UNGH stands for United Nations Ganja House.

"an angry little twat"
How little? Little in size or age?

Oh dear.

9:47 AM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

Let me clarify Letter C. I use the diminutive, but I really think it's an angry, big twat. Really big. Monumental. Like a Taj mahal to twatness.

There. Now FO-CUS on what's in my mouth right now. FO-CUS.

2:11 PM  
Anonymous Your Biggest Fan said...

Look: if it's an angry BIG twat, you should fucking say "big twat." If it's an angry LITTLE twat, you should say "little twat." Let's get some accuracy going here. How am I supposed to guess if I don't know what the hell it is you're saying?

3:16 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

I have no idea how people around you don't stop slapping you so that you have a moment to tap out your monkey-like responses.

FO-CUS. ON MY MOUTH. Nothing Else Matters.

10:09 AM  

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