2/1/06

The State of My Union is STRONG

YES. IT. IS. Fellow citizens and denizens of My Mouth, the state of My union is strong. From the VAGBLDFRTs in the East, to Lake Vajisnatch in the West, My Mouth has had it all. Say it with me, "I CAN I CAN I CAN." If you ever forget, you CAN scroll down to the bottom of this webpage.

FOCUS on the state of MY Union. FO-CUS.

gwiMMrn:

A) Alternative energy, like clean, safe vaginal blood farts.
B) A petition to make so-called "Period Gas" an acceptable vegan substitute for "the meat farts."
C) Corn on my cob.
D) Pearls, but NOT the kind you get from oysters.
E) Yayoi Kusama's phallic couch.
F) Files.
G) Gummy sperms.
H) A big, fat, phallic-centered patriarchichical cock.

UPDATE: Professor Al Newport reports "Word is out that GWIMMRN is due to be bought by Rupert Murdoch and turned into a Fox network show starring the Olsen twins. (Or was it Paris Hilton?)" The official GWiMMRN response is I) A jar of the finally legal veganesque-vaginal period gas of the anorexic-looking Olsen twin. GWiMMRN has no more to say about it at the current time, other than "FO-CUS on what is in my mouth right now."

UPDATE UPDATE: Quick! The boss is coming! Exit this disgusting and possibly pink-slip inducing website now! Quick! TURN IT OFF!! TURN IT OFF!!!!!

9 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

There is no such thing as a "safe" vaginal bloodfart. They're all dangerous.

8:53 AM  
Anonymous Y. Kusama said...

My fulnitule is fal flom pharric. Thele ale no genitars in my designs.

8:53 AM  
Anonymous Brian Dennehy said...

I, for one, will NOT stand behind an initiative that accepts ANY substitute for my meat farts.

8:54 AM  
Blogger Philosopher Newport said...

"Vegan" is just another word for Period Fart, no?

Vegans murder plants; happily chew their wilting bodies, and shit (v.) green turds. just another misguided superiority trip, really.

Word is out that GWIMMRN is due to be bought by Rupert Murdoch and turned into a Fox network show starring the Olsen twins. (Or was it Paris Hilton?)

Do tell, ol' chap, do tell.

10:11 AM  
Anonymous The Boss said...

What the hell were you looking at just then?

11:04 AM  
Blogger wahhhboohoo said...

WAAHHH!! boo hoo uhu uhuh huh hhhhh WAAAHH!! BUH BUH HOOOOOOO! VAGINALBLOODFARTS HOO HOO! BOO FUCKING HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO!! Waaah! wah!

11:22 AM  
Anonymous You said...

Nothing, Boss. Nothing. I was working.

Yup.

Working.

12:26 PM  
Anonymous The Boss said...

You're fired. You should have TURNED IT OFF!! TURNED IT OFF!!!!! faster.

2:17 PM  
Anonymous You said...

You're stifling my freedom of speech!

2:21 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home