1/19/06

Time to Dial 911

Call Emergency Services, because when you guess what's in my mouth right now, you're going to plotz! You're going to just...just...plotz! You'll fall the fuck down thanking God, Jesus, and my mouth for all kinds of shit! Oh, yeah. But then you'll get back up again. Yup. I promise.

A) A dog log
B) My left forefinger right after probing both Tara Reid and Paris Hilton's anuses, feeling for rectal polyps, hemo-ruh-ruh-roids, a baked potato, and a good parking spot
C) The illegitimate hate-child of Lord Assmunch, Duke of Puke and Baron of Crappersfield
D) Seventeen pairs of labia minora, not mine
E) A nice plate of fish and chips, all crispy and hot with some lemon and cocktail sauce
F) A chip butty
G) A big, fat, chip buttylicious CUHHHHHHHHH-HOCK

UPDATE: The answer is NOT H) Scary ripples. They were in there for a few seconds last week, but didn't make the cut.

7 Comments:

Anonymous Scary Nipples Fan Club said...

WE LOVE YOU SCARY NIPPLES! DON'T CHANGE A THING!

8:04 AM  
Anonymous Sir Lord Assmunch, Knight of the Rectal Realm said...

Billy Jean, the child is not my son.

8:05 AM  
Anonymous Bus Bhuh? Whuh? said...

Wait.

Labia.

Ummm. They uh.

What? Oh. Right. Never

They come in pairs?

8:06 AM  
Anonymous Helen Thomas said...

YOU CAN'T USE MY FRIIIIES! I'M USING THEM!

oh its the administration's fault... oh, the gravy on my vaginal chip butty is too warm. Oh.

8:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Do we light the labia minora for hannukkah?

12:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm going to throw up RE: Helen Thomas's comment.

Any second now.

2:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Only light your OWN labia minora.

Your OWN.

Your.

OWN.

3:08 PM  

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