1/18/06

Bump Day, BUMP DAY, BUMP DAY! Edition of GWiMMRN

It's clear to me that many, if not all of you have been thinking about things that aren't my mouth and its contents. I'm sick of having to tell you to focus. Is it that difficult? Focus. I know you can do it. Repeat after me: "I CAN. I CAN. I CAN. I CAN FOCUS." Don't think of an elephant. I said DON'T. Instead, guess what's in my mouth right now:

A) Marshall Applewhite's excised testicles, each one bitten in half
B) The new air freshener "Poopourri," intended to give every room that fresh "I just shit the bed" scent
C) Just what the guy was thinking when he squeezed Scarlett Johansen's teats on the red carpet at the Golden Globes
D) Scarlett Johansen's crimson globes (with handprints)
E) The adorable little 臀部 寒毛 near Scarlett Johansen's 肛門
F) Marshall Applewhite's big, fat cometty cock

7 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I knew there was a reason to watch the red carpet at the Golden Globes!

8:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you spray Poopourri on the bed, do the sheets turn brown? Or is it like luminol, that glows when there's fecal matter?

I NEED to KNOW.

8:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What do I mean?

8:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You've got to BE there!

9:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What?

Did you

hear.

Hear something.

?

12:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

臀部 寒毛 means "ass hairs," I think.

You KNOW what 肛門 means.

12:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, EVERYONE knows what 肛門 means.

2:01 PM  

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