Just Get Over the Bump Day, and It'll Be All Right
Fwew! Wednesday. Wonderful Wednesday. In my mouth. The implications are enough to cause a centipede to trip over itself. Staggering, I tell you. Whoo. Okay. Time to, well, you know.
A) A big dog's oat-tote
B) Eugene's sick habit of mocking shark-attack victims
C) Several tiny but oh-so expensive cookies
D) The new Joe Rogan-hosted show Animal Penis Factor, where the contestants have to eat the johnsons of several different endangered species within a predetermined time limit. Anyone who pukes is forced to re-ingest the vomitus at gunpoint, and the prize for the winner is a packet of Alka-Seltzer and a punch to the back of the head while Joe bugles, "Congratulations, shitcake."
E) Hot dog cake a la mode
F) A spooch on the rocks, with the "rocks" actually seminal fluid frozen in ice cube trays
G) Several tiny but oh-so expensive fetid, pulsating cocks
A) A big dog's oat-tote
B) Eugene's sick habit of mocking shark-attack victims
C) Several tiny but oh-so expensive cookies
D) The new Joe Rogan-hosted show Animal Penis Factor, where the contestants have to eat the johnsons of several different endangered species within a predetermined time limit. Anyone who pukes is forced to re-ingest the vomitus at gunpoint, and the prize for the winner is a packet of Alka-Seltzer and a punch to the back of the head while Joe bugles, "Congratulations, shitcake."
E) Hot dog cake a la mode
F) A spooch on the rocks, with the "rocks" actually seminal fluid frozen in ice cube trays
G) Several tiny but oh-so expensive fetid, pulsating cocks
posted by My Mouth at 4:56 AM
20 Comments:
Boy, those tiny cookies look good.
Please let APF be a big hit. I need the work.
I like my spooch shaken, not stirred, and certainly not on the rocks, unless it occurs in the mountains, in which case the on the rocks thing is unavoidable.
What's your fax number? I have a quesblun.
The fax line is busy.
The fax line is still busy.
The fax line is busy again. I'll try back later.
Nope, still busy. I'll try again later.
Just checking to see if the line was free. Guess it's not. O.K. I'll try again later. My enthusiasm is not dimmed.
O.K. Now I'm getting some weird signal or something. I think the fax line is still busy. Is everyone else faxing about that dump yesterday? Or is it just me? O.K. I'll try again later.
Fax line is STILL busy. Sheesh.
Wow. That fax line has been busy for, like, 3 hours. Maybe some of you should let other people get a chance to fax something, huh? I mean, I want to know about that dump yesterday and I just can't get my fax through!
Let me check again.
Still busy. Wow. I can't believe how busy the fax machine number has been. I mean, really. Wow. This is just not funny anymore. Not funny at all.
Yes, I CAN I CAN I CAN.
The line is still BUSY BUSY BUSY.
Besides, you just changed the number from 1-888 to 1-800. Which is it?
Oh, sorry. That number must have been a misprint. Try it again.
Which is the misprint? 1-888 or 1-800?
The fax lines for BOTH are busy.
Yeah, it's okay.
Don't worry about it.
i cant stop worrying about it. please. tell me about the dump. please
please
ple
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