I'm So Fuckin' Tired on Mondays
And the reason is because I've been working hard, putting the finest ingredients on God's green earth into my mouth. I'm open all day, every day, even on Christmas. Where else do you get that kind of service, except at the 7-11? Nowhere, man. No. Where. So, after giving a brief word of thanks to my mouth, guess what's in it right now:
A) That uncomfortable quandry you're in when you have a painful hemo-ruh-ruh-roid and have to take a shit: do you risk it and spray rectal bleeding all over the bowl, or hold it in?
B) The true origin of the chip butty
C) Eugene's triumphant return to the blogosphere
D) Tu. S. Tin's deep desire to have Wahhh Boohoo speak to her, which will never happen
E) Chicken fingers covered in Panko bread crumbs and fried until GBD (golden brown and delicious)
F) Hume Cronyn's last meal, consisting of undigested tofu, a strawberry-banana yogurt smoothie, bran muffins, and an entire kilo of DOG FECES
G) Hume Cronyn's big, fat cock (sort of)
A) That uncomfortable quandry you're in when you have a painful hemo-ruh-ruh-roid and have to take a shit: do you risk it and spray rectal bleeding all over the bowl, or hold it in?
B) The true origin of the chip butty
C) Eugene's triumphant return to the blogosphere
D) Tu. S. Tin's deep desire to have Wahhh Boohoo speak to her, which will never happen
E) Chicken fingers covered in Panko bread crumbs and fried until GBD (golden brown and delicious)
F) Hume Cronyn's last meal, consisting of undigested tofu, a strawberry-banana yogurt smoothie, bran muffins, and an entire kilo of DOG FECES
G) Hume Cronyn's big, fat cock (sort of)
posted by My Mouth at 5:43 AM
9 Comments:
I am OUTRAGED at that picture. NEVER AGAIN will I click on ANY links on this DISGUSTING and vile website.
Ick, is all I have to say.
I am looking forward to Eugene's next poem. It'll probably be about jerking off or something.
Did Hume Cronyn die?
Yes, Jessica. Hume's dead.
And so are you. Get back in your grave, vile thing! Avaunt, shade! Urge me no more dismay!
I was okay with dinner until the DOG FECES.
GIVE ME BACK MY FINGERS
NO. I WILL NOT GIVE YOU BACK YOUR FINGERS.
Did you know you can get the word "colon" out of "colonel"?
Ah say ah say, you CAHN-NOT. Ah say.
I'm full.
Post a Comment
<< Home