12/3/05

GWiMMRN, Later Saturday Edition

I can't always be here to answer your comments, questions, and concerns. I am often on the road, looking for the very best things to put in my mouth. So all of you who were hoping for a Saturday morning edition, you're shit out of luck. I was too busy to post. I'm posting now, though. Preamble's over. GWiMMRN:

A) The enormous gap in between the yellow front teeth of the fucking retard working Register 9 at Wal-Mart
B) 5000 milligrams of Beano, ground up, cut with baby laxative, and snorted off the well-rounded ass of a teenage Filipino hooker with chlamydia and a harelip
C) John Seigenthaler's overweening sense of self-importance, cut with baby shit and smeared on a slice of whole-grain bread
D) The unlubricated, hair-choked tuna taco belonging to the moronic bitch at the toy store who gleefully informed the person in front of me that they didn't have any electric card shufflers in stock, and didn't bother to say where one might find them elsewhere
E) A long, snaky chest hair still attached to the weird dent near Lindsay Lohan's left sweater puppy
F) John Seigenthaler's teensy, weensy little ting-ting

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait, is it you that has the clap and the harelip, or is it the Filipino hooker? See, this information is vital for guessing.

9:56 AM  
Anonymous L. Lohan's Sweater Puppies said...

*ark* *ark!*

9:56 AM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

I'm harelip and chlamydia free.

What's your guess? Choose wisely.

11:09 AM  
Anonymous J. Seigenthaler said...

Hey fuck you, man! I'm an important person here!

Jitbags.

11:34 AM  

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