9/21/06

GWiMMRN, I'm So Fucking Tired Today Edition

I'm tired of the lack of focusing.

Other than that, I've got as much energy as a hummingbird on Benzedrine after it's eaten an entire slice of really good hot dog cake.

GUESS:

A) A very tasty 14 oz. sirloin cooked to medium-rare perfection, a mediocre caprese salad, Lyonnaise potatoes with crispy skin, and a delicious flourless chocolate-espresso cake with a dollop of vanilla ice cream
B) The fact that it's 12 hours after such a meal, and my digestive tract has yet to make the slightest inroad into disintegrating it: it is sitting in my stomach exactly the way it did last night after I ate it
C) *brrrrrrrp*
D) *prrp* *frrrrippp*
E) *brrrrrrRRRRRRrrowwwwwp*
F) Katie Couric's colonoscopy camera, not the least bit washed off after its harrowing "trip"
G) Mushy tomatoes, substandard mozzarella, and not enough basil
H) A big, fat cockoscopy

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Serves you right for eating all that steak.

thbbt.

11:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Boy, those are some scary noises coming out of you. I bet there's a smell attached to those noises.

I'll bet.

Wanna bet?

I got the money, if you want to bet.

OK.

Whatever. Chicken.

11:05 AM  
Anonymous Spinach Leaf Basted in E Coli Au Jus said...

You should eat me and then you won't feel so full anymore.

Here I am. Waiting for you.

To eat me, that is.

11:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can you post some of those Couric pics? You know, from the camera?

I'd... I'd really like to see them.

I plan on wallpapering my bedroom with Katie Couric's colonoscopy pictures.

11:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi.

I'm still waiting for you to post those pics. The pics of the colonoscopy.

I... I want to put them...

I want to put them on my WALL.

7:24 AM  

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