Bump Day Edition of GWiMMRN

From here on in, Wednesdays will be referred to as "Bump Days." They also happen to be the days where I get to put all sorts of things in my mouth. Can YOU guess what's in there right now? Sure you can:

A) Eugene's unsightly bulge, likely as a consequence of having read his favorite magazine, Chicken Little
B) A length of chorizo that bears a suspicious resemblance to a huge turd with a string stuck in it
C) The Poconos
D) Eugene's joyless meat with Sheppy's spit all over it (come on out Shepster, you little cocksucker, you)
E) The uncomfortable feeling that I should sort of lay off that homosexual reprobate Sheppy, already...just tone it down a little
F) Rat turd rice krispies treats stuck between a pair of dentures, not mine
G) Some old fuck trundling around with his piss-damp diapers falling down, mumbling, "Where'th mah teef? Where'th mah teef?"
H) Eugene's big, fat cock (the dog, not the person)


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love chorizo, you meatless freak.

8:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think's it a good idea to lay off of Sheppy, for goodness sakes. He didn't do anything wrong and you're being unfair.

8:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How did you get the rat-turds to not melt while making the rice-krispies treats? I assumed you baked them.

8:52 AM  
Anonymous Old Fuck said...

Gimme back mah dentures, yah sickie fuck ya.

Dagnabit, pissed m'self.

8:53 AM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

You have NO IDEA what Sheppy's done. I say when it's time to lay off Sheppy, not you. Little fucker's been asking for it for YEARS, and it's finally payback.

9:05 AM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

By the way, a good, solid rat turd has a melting point of 415 degrees Fahrenheit, and the rice krispies treats don't go over that, not by a long chalk.

And if you MUST know, I found the rat turds in Sheppy's toothbrush. He brushes his teeth with rat shit, you heard it here first.

9:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I stand corrected.

9:31 AM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

Well, sit down, then.

Did you guess what's in my mouth?

9:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No, no I didn't.

11:14 AM  

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