A Big Creamy Ending

That's all you want out of life, isn't it? A big creamy ending.

ooo. The fucking implications.


A) My raging libido.
B) Albie the Squirrel's testicular cancer.
C) All those creamy things you shouldn't talk about in public.
D) Conan, the Cimmerian, whose crown sets heavy on his muscular fucking head.
E) A shiver intended for YOU.
F) F you.
G) A big, fat cock's creamy ending.

UPDATE: Go soak your head.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Listen, if you don't want to BE here, then why don't you just go home?

Nobody's got a gun to your head. It's not like you're in the military or something.

2:32 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...


2:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was just trying to be helpful.

2:33 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

Well, you're not BEING helpful.

2:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fine. Last time I try to help.

2:34 PM  
Anonymous Jesus said...

You know, you're not making a whole lot of friends here. Nobody likes a mopey Gus. I mean, name one person who likes you. I'll bet you can't think of one.

2:39 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

I like me.

My Penis is a Captain of Industry likes me.

2:40 PM  
Blogger El Capitan said...


2:41 PM  
Anonymous Jesus said...

My Penis is a Captain of Industry doesn't even exist. He's just a manifestation of YOU. Everyone knows that you write that blog.

2:42 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

If you're trying to cheer me up, calling me names and accusing me of talking to imaginary friends isn't helping.

In short, that CAKE HOLE comment goes for you, too, Jesus.

2:44 PM  
Anonymous Jesus said...

You're invalidating my point by being obtuse and absurd.

Fine. You're all alone in the world and nobody understands you. Geeze. Nobody knows what THAT'S like.

2:45 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

Sarcasm doesn't fit a messiah.

2:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Forget it, Jesus. My Mouth is in one of his bad moods and nothing can pull him out of it.

Serves him right, that sick fuck. Making jokes about testicular cancer. Aren't you afraid that by making jokes about it, it will happen to you?

2:49 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

I make jokes about all sorts of things that have yet to happen to me. Why would only the BAD things happen? Here, I'm making a joke about recieving a billion dollars, tax free.

Why won't THAT happen, and the testicular cancer would? Is that the way the world works? That only BAD things happen? Here, I'm making a joke about rescuing all the refugees in Darfur. Why would testicular cancer happen and not that?


2:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You should just go home.

2:53 PM  
Blogger My Mouth said...

Fine. I will.

But before I do, guess what's in my mouth right now.

2:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I guess D ... do you want to live forever?
I love you mouth, and your crazy comments... the web sundae too... I even laugh at your captian of industry site sometimes (but don't tell jesus.)

7:41 PM  
Anonymous Jesus said...

I heard that.

10:33 AM  

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