10/27/06

GWiMMRN, GROW THE FUCK UP Edition

Why can't you just GROW UP? Huh? GROW UP.

It's not that hard. First you GROW, then you go UP. How fucking simple is that?

GROW UP.

GROW UP.

My all-time bestest buddy in the whole wide world, Deroy Murdock, "Patron Saint" of GWiMMRN is all grown up, and he can toss a leprous chihuahua's shit-smeared salad in under thirty minutes!

So GROW UP.

And while you're doing all that GROWing UP, GWiMMRN:

A) An anonymous soapy handjob, begged for by an obviously lying African herbivore
B) Nail clippers with a crust of dried blood and pus on the blades, obviously used by someone very GROWn UP
C) A roasted prostate on a stick
D) That time where that chick who sucked like fifty guys off threw up all over the 51st, dousing him with stomach acid, bile, tequila, nacho remnants, and spooge
E) The kind of dull, obvious irony this entire post is supposed to represent
F) The 52nd guy, who later realized he wasn't going to get blown and left in a huff
G) GROW your dirty ass the fuck UP
H) A big, fat, totally mature cock

17 Comments:

Anonymous The 53rd Guy said...

I'm willing to wait.

7:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't know about you, but that cartoon picture of a prostate gland gave me a Texas-sized woody.

7:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

First I'm gonna GROW up.

And then I'm gonna THROW up!

hee hee hee hee!

*BLLOOOORRRAAAGGUUUUGGHHHHRRRPPP!*

o

o my

8:21 AM  
Anonymous Sister SuckAss, the Transgendered Homophobe said...

I am a Pro State kind of guy!

I don't know what that means.

Join my web revolution.

8:23 AM  
Anonymous S. Irwin said...

I'm weighted down by all the IRONy on this website!

hee hee hee hee!

*BLLOOOORRRAAAGGUUUUGGHHHHRRRPPP!*

o

o my

get this stingray out of my heart

8:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous "Crocodile Hunter" Fan said...

That's not funny!

I know who you are, you know.

8:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The 53rd guy is pretty troubling.

I'm quite distressed by him.

Quite.

Care to respond?

8:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is it just me, or are all the vomit sounds on this website getting both more disgusting and realistic?

8:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*HEEEAAAACCKKKGHUAUUUGGHBLAHRRHAH*

*huh* *huh*

*fftbtbit*

*huh*

o oh my

*HHUURRAAGHUAGHUGH!* *BLLOOOAUGHOORRRP!*

you...

you're right about that.

10:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some of these sounds spelled out here on the internets make me want to throw up myself.

It's the realism that draws me to this website.

THE REALISM.

I know who you are, too, by the way.

10:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh yeah? I'll tell you what:

FUCK YOU is who I am.

FUCK YOU is how old I am.

Oh YEAH!

11:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Letter G) doesn't really sound like something you can put in your mouth. It's a command.

I'm trying to make a DIFFERENCE here. I'm trying to WORK THINGS OUT.

Give me some credit.

11:12 AM  
Anonymous The 52nd Guy said...

I'm not willing to wait myself! I've got my standards.

If she'd've waited until AFTER blowing me to vomit, that would've been okay. But she threw up BEFORE.

Inconsiderate bitch.

11:14 AM  
Anonymous The 50th Guy said...

Was it something I did?

11:15 AM  
Anonymous The 14th Guy said...

Aaaahhh.

I feel pretty good, actually!

11:15 AM  
Anonymous 49th Guy said...

Actually, the whole "incident" is my fault.

See, a little blood came out when I "shot my load." I'm surprised the chick held out as long as she did. I mean, if I tasted blood when a guy "spooned out some man-custard," I sure as heck would toss my cookies.

12:05 PM  
Anonymous The Law Firm of Stomach Acid, Bile, Tequila, Nacho Remnants, and Spooge said...

There's really no reason for me to say anything here. I think our law firm's title says it all.

Sincerely yours,

Jakov Cumblood, esq.

The Law Firm of Stomach Acid, Bile, Tequila, Nacho Remnants, and Spooge

12:12 PM  

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